Me Vs. The Squatty Potty Adventures

This Ukraine trip I actually almost got all the way through this trip without using the “Squatty Potty”.  Me and the squatty potties never work out our differences.  One of our favorite things to do in the Zap region was go ice skating. At an older age I managed to get off the side walls and make use of my feet, ankles and legs muscles with cycling and running to actually do something other then hang onto the wall, fall or take a poor innocent person down with me.  So now I actually have my own hockey skates and can have some fun.  So the other night when we had Sergiy and Sasha we took them to the ice skating rink.  It was late at night and I had planned to bring the boys back the next day so I gathered I would save my energy for the next day to skate with them knowing my chances of not falling were slim to none.  So Oksana and I chilled out in the little cafeteria room and drank some coffee.  Well what comes in must come out.  So I go to use the room and I walk into this single stall and all I can think is “Oh no….the squatty potty”.  I just stood there staring at it for a good solid minute then looked down at my layers of clothes and jackets and made a plan of attack how to juggle the jacket, the sweatshirt, the 2 thermal shirts, the jeans, the running thermal pants, the belt, the purse, the hat on my head when everytime I look down it covers my eyes and I cannot see.  Holy crapola.  So I attempted this maneover with success at least so I thought.  I did my business and now I tried to get up.  My legs were pretty much stuck in the squatty position from my pants being tight around my calves with all the layers and as I prepared to lift myself for take off position the floor was so wet from all the ice skaters using the bathroom my boots could not grip.  Both feet went out from underneath me and both me feet hit the sidewalls.  Thank heavens for small stalls.  I braced and prepared mentally for my butt to be in the squatty potty!  Again thank heavens for sidewalls.  Once my boots hit the sidewalls I just stayed squatting and again the thought process went through my mind “how do I not fall in the potty”.  I look down and my belt it literally an inch from being in the bowl where everyones business goes.  Oh my……….so I said a little prayer and tucked my belt into my pants branced my hands on the wall and prayed I could stand.  LOL!  Oh how I love walls!  Mission complete. 

So the following day skating with the kids once again me verse the squatty potty.  This time mentally I was prepared I knew what I had to do and could at least have a better shot of success.  This time I had hockey skates on so I had to have a plan to slide more or hope for the best I would slide less.  The hockey skates were my advantage this time.  By golly I had grip.  It was the most successful squatty potty adventure I have had yet! 

Then the grand final’e.  Ya know I cannot leave Ukraine without a funny sense of humor from my Lord and Savior.  I gather ok heading back to America no more squatty potties…..WRONG!  We get to the Donesk airport hauling all our suitcases and it was a 3 hour drive and I had been holding it since about 30 minutes after we left.  With the idea of having to go so bad any sign at that point looked like a women to me on the door.  Didn’t think twice and yes you guessed I went into the mens bathroom.  I walk in pass the sinks…..pass urenals……straight to the stalls.  Yes it registered those were urenals.  But then again I was think ok in parts of Franch maybe Europe folks have those Bidet thingies so  ya know ladies could want to freshen up.  So I get into my tight little clean stall and look down….”Oh know, not again”.  I have not choice it is me and the squatty potty and I got 2.5 hours of holding it.  So as I am doing my business I hear a cough….that was a deep cough.  Oh know…..then I listen and I hear yes someone doing a number two.  Ok that could be a guy or girl.  Can’t gauge off of a person pooping.  Then I here footsteps and a luggage going by….I don’t hear heels.  Every women in Ukraine wears heels whether it be boots or just plain heels.  Then I hear footsetps coming back in…no freaking heels.  Then I hear another clearing of the throat.  Crap I am in the MEN’S bathroom.  OK Nicole do what you do and don’t look back, pray no one sees you.  What until it sounds empty in the bathroom, pass the now what you know is urenals and don’t look anyone in the eye like you normally do.  For goodness sakes you have handiwipes and have used them your hole trip so don’t even wash your hands just exit calm and smoothly like you intentionally went in there.  Goodness this is the 3^rd time I have done this in my life by accident.  I got it under control.  So I wait to hear for a clearing.  I can hear what sounded like a man exiting and what sounded like a man finishing.  I waited for the hand dryer to stop drying the dudes hands and bolted out of the stall.  Of course as I was walking out here comes a staff worker at the airport in his fluorescent vest walking in.  I just smiled, held the door open for him and did not look back and kept on walking and then reached for my handiwipes!  I love handiwipes!  So at this point we are waiting for our flight and I know I am nearing the squatty potty time frame once again this time I will give myself enough time to make sure I enter the womens bathroom.  Oh boy! 

Note:  Went into correct bathroom and I will say this.  This bathroom although had proper toilets and seats the BOYS bathroom is MUCH cleaner!  Ladies we need to kick it up a couple knotches!

Boomerang.......

I do not expect anyone reading this to understand fully.  It is easy to snivel, complain, put down and even insult when you looking into ones life and the decisions they have made without walking in their shoes. 

For those of you that have been following our blog you may have felt called to pray for Sergiy, or us or even fault us, how can you give up this child.....  Not sure but the fact remains we know we did everything possible in our capabilities and skills to bring this young man home. 

Sergiy in his mind wanted family as every child does but the idea of the the effort it takes to be in one was far greater then what he wanted to commit to.  His absolute awesome commitment to his friends outweighed his desire for a family.  He reached out to friends right before we left saying he wanted us to come for him and he was sorry.  We talked to his teachers that have been nothing short of gracious and awesome to help him and us and they vouched he said was ready.  We went back to the school to go get him and our time, love and effort was still not enough for him. 

So I can write this as we prepare to head home to America knowing in my heart that we fought the good fight and loved this kid with our sleeves up and on our knees and we still will but afar for his future.  I called him my boomerang because he would leave and come back and leave and come back.  I so wish it could go differently.  Although in my heart I have peace and a clear conscience it still does not take away the pain.  I still have no idea why the Lord brought me here and we went through all this but I will wipe the dust and dirt off and get back up again and count each and every blessing he has given me on this trip.  I praise the Lord that our marriage stayed strong and steady during this roller coaster ride.   I praise the Lord that Joe was willing to not walk away and try one more time with Sergiy so we could leave again knowing we did all we could.  I praise the Lord for our awesome translator Oksana that has been on this ride with us and has fought alongside us.  She is incredible.  I praise God for all the awesome prayer warriors we had and have.  I praise the Lord for our absolutely amazing son Kolya at home.  We only appreciate him all the more and the young man that he is and will become.   I praise the Lord for all the awesome families I have met along the way.  Sergiy is loved far more then he will ever realize.  I praise the Lord for the air I breath.  I praise the Lord for all the awesome kids I met interviewing for New Horizons For Children.  Every single new child I interviewed I would take into the program.  They are each worth fighting for to give them a chance of hope, a future and family.  If anything this trip will only make me fight harder for the ones I know told me straight to my face I want out....like little guy Maxim.  He looked me in the eyes and said I want out, I want a family.  The directors told me every day he comes to them and asks them if a family has come for him.  I asked him what were his 3 wishes....A family...America and a family in America.  The directors told me that they jokingly tell him that they already have a ticket purchased for him on stand-by.  They know he is ready to go.  During the interview he started to cry.  I gotta fight for Maxim and the other ones that told me they are ready for family.  They are all worth fighting for and giving them a chance of love, Christ and hope. 

YES He Is Coming Home!

Court is Monday at 10AM.  I will write soon!  Praise the Lord were bringing him home!

Saved by Grace but Greatly Fallen......

Where to begin....
When I sit here trying to figure out how to write this I drawl a blank with the sorrow I feel.  I actually think of our skateboarding ministries name FallenbutSaved.  We are greatly fallen right now but we are saved by Gods grace.  With that grace I am trusting in the Lord that he knows best even if it is and was not the outcome we had hoped for.  We knew before we came here to Ukraine for Sergiy we may very well not be returning with him.  But it was worth the gamble to us to come for him.  We new he was loyal as a lion to his friends which is a rare thing to find that worked for him to survive and worked against him to let a family into his life.  His family is the kids at his school, it is the only family he has known and you cannot fault him for that.  It has carried him all these years.

When we sat in the office after our arrival after he had been longing for us to come and he sat there not able to give us a "Yes" to come but he needed more time.  I knew right then he was not ready for this.  It has been a tug a war match since we arrived.  So many things have been thrown at us and Sergiy it is a blessing were all still standing at this point.  As mentioned before many are very personal things so I cannot go into detail for our respect for this young man and our family.  We all took each hit and tried to fight and stay up but the long and short of it was we could not let and we would not push for Sergiy to come home if it was not in his heart to be with us.  If we did we knew it would come back to bite us and he truly would not have his heart in this and he would not be happy.  So it became clear we needed to let go.  This has been like a death to me as I go through waves of emotions and grieving.  I can't even imagine how torn Sergiy is, he has never known family except through his friends.  Yesterday I found myself on the floor of a public bathroom in tears praying for God to give me peace and clarity in all this.  To see what he is trying to teach me, show me in all of this pain.  (thankfully it was a very clean bathroom and it even had a toilet and toilet seat!) Again I may never see or know why God put this young man on my heart and called us to host and prepare to adopt him, but he did.  I do not question it nor do I waiver in what I know God called us to do but I have to trust in him and not question God either but to just have faith that he is sovereign and has his reason in which I may not see now and I very well could not ever see.  I had a post a couple weeks back basically being questioned or informed that it is a bit reckless to come over here for Sergiy while still needing some funds for this trip.  And that we should have an emergency fund and yada yada.....I will say this, the Lord provided the funds at the very last minute as I trusted and knew he would.  If that lady were to ask me now knowing what I know now would I still gamble and come here for Sergiy knowing the outcome.  The answer is "Yes".  He was worth the gamble to come here in hopes to bring him home.

I ask that you continue to pray for Sergiy first and foremost.  Thankfully he knows his heavenly father but none of us can imagine what his thoughts and heart must be feeling.  I know he is torn as we are.  The idea of leaving his friends behind shattered him to the core.  Loyal as a Lion. 

Joe and I will be meeting with Pastor John this afternoon in hopes to develop a plan for him to work with the children in Sergiys orphanage to help prepare them for adoption and their families coming and the emotional journey they will go on in hopes to avoid what what we did.  To give these kids hope until their families come after hosting in hopes they do not fall into negative ways or habits or develop unhealthy relationships.  So basically they can have a spiritual counselor to guide them and keep them afloat and encourage them to hang in there. To teach them about trusting others.  To teach them English and prepare them for the America.  From the time Sergiy started to bond with us which was the last 2 days of hosting that bond was not strong enough for him by the time we came 4 weeks later to hang onto what we had.  The negative influences got to him.  He fell easily back into the crowd and distant from us.  So we want to avoid that in any possible way if we can for any other families.  So our prayer is that Pastor John will be allowed with the school's permission to start working with these soon to be adopted kids and they would be willing to let John speak into their lives and help them along the way to never give up hope.

The plan...we will be here until Friday to do New Horizon For Children interviews in a couple boarding schools then head back home to America.  I know I need to finish what I started and see this through.

In you, LORD my God, I put my trust.  -Psalm 25:1    


 

Catching Up!

Hello All,

Again I cannot thank you all for all you many prayers that are felt daily.  I ask that you please keep them coming.  I cannot go into details but so many things have been thrown at us like curve balls and we are all under attack daily but the one thing remains, God is good and he is sovereign and he wants us to fight to become a family.  Our battle gear is on and each of us are ready to fight knowing God is our protection and armor.  Satan will stop at nothing and he has made it clear and for this I have found my prayer to God daily has gone to another depth to bring me closer to him. 

So we ask for your continued prayer for our boy and family.  We are blessed to have him with us for the weekend and we are so enjoying having his smiling face around, hearing his laughs and jokes and his girly scream. 

Joe's work was awesome and they have allowed him to work another week here so in hopes we can get our court date next week.  That is another prayer request that we will have our court next week so we can all get home.  We are all ready to be home.  Soon as I have the date I will let you all know! (:

Again thank you, thank you thank you for all your prayers and support!

Up Hill In The Snow For 5 Miles......

New Hope Ministry Team at Internet

Mummifying the kiddos!

Checkers competitions.  Yes that is my bandit boy on the end.

Joe & Sasha playing checkers

Awesome to see him smile!

Marko Polo on land!

More checkers......

The ladies getting their nails done!

Sergiy and Sasha playing a round

Sergiy and Papa...

Mom found her favorite squirrel at the mall!!!  Love this guy from Ice Age!

Frozen Dewberrys

Ok the joke you hear your parents say....I use to have to walk 5 miles up hill in the snow, through the trees....etc.  Well that was us today!

This morning we got to spend some time with some wonderful people from New Hope that is an outreach program here locally for the timing out kids and a month ago started working with the Vil'y 9th and 10th graders.  A good amount us packed out the centers van like a bunch of sardines and headed to the school this morning.  Today was a beautiful snow all day.  Not as cold today with the light snow all day.  Today Sergiy was a little more quiet and distant then yesterday.  We know this will go in waves so not anything abnormal.  I still hugged him non the less.  I could see he was tired.  He said he did not sleep last night.  I know he has a lot on his mind.  It was cool to watch the mission team in action.  The ladies painted the girls nails.  They brought in the 9th and 10th grade kiddos.  Then the boys learned to play strategy checkers by a competitive player.  Then also they toilet papered each other into mummies, played a mafia game and a type of marko polo game.  Then the lunch bell rang and the kids were gone before you could blink.  Not a one told the team thank you...they just bolted.  Then all the sudden one girl ran back in and came around and said thank you and hugged everyone.  That was awesome.  Then there was this little girl.....oh my goodness you just wanted to shove her in your suitcase.  She was a doll and after all the big kids left she came over and started to play checkers with some of the mission team.  She is 10 years old and has two brothers.  She is a real peach.  Oh my goodness.  The staff at the school once again was nothing short of kind to us and the mission team and VERY welcoming to them coming back to do more work with the kids.  It was great to take witness too.

Sergiy our kiddo was one of the heard of cattle that ran out without a word of anything.  They just ran like a bunch of Forrest Gumps!  LOL!  So Joe and I looked at each other and said OK, then let's join the team and head out.  We have no clue the school schedule and we don't know where Sergiy is at mentally with the adoption he has much to thank about and let's put the ball in his court for us to leave and he comes out from lunch and where not there.  Will he miss us or will he not?  Let's give him that to thank about should he come out and expect to see us sitting there.  Reverse physiology.  Sergiy is a very smart boy.  He is the type you only need to say something once and he will not forget.  He's a thinking man.  So we left with the team.  So we head out and we were told as a joke we are going to walk 5 miles in the snow through the woods.  Well.......the joke became reality!  One bus stop got passed because we missed the street to turn on when walking.  Then we got to another one that we thought was where one was and that was not the case.  So we ended up walking in the snow for about 2 miles looking for the bus stop.  So I got the real feel of Ukraine snow and cold.  Couldn't feel my lip, head, toes or hands.  It got hard to talk which is a good thing for me!  LOL!  Thank goodness I had my new handi dandi Ukraine scarf so I wrapped that sucker around my neck so I looked like I was being choked out by a Boa Constrictor.  LOL!  So we finally get to a train stop, go over the bridge and then wait for the bus.  We had good conversation,making jokes, talking about serving with the kiddos and I watched this dog board to death in a yard try to start eating the wood fencing.   Bus comes we hope on and get into the town of Zap, go to grab a bite to eat at this VERY good buffet cafe.  Killer Americano coffee!  We defrost so we can start to feel our limps!  We had a couple coffee and the second time I went back for a coffee this sweet girl handed me the coffee and looked me in the eye and said "God bless you" in English.  BLEW MY MIND.  I said thank you then walked to the cashier to pay.  Turned back around over to her and leaned over and said "God bless you too".  That really stuck with me.  No matter the outcome of this trip God wanted us here.  It just gave me a shot of joy to hear those words especially when you rarely hear them in our own country in the US.  So then Joe and I pocked around and found a killer knife store.  We bought the boys both their first pocket knives.  Mama found a couple two.  I am still working on Joe to let me get one.  I told him common I could be asking for diamonds and clothes but I ask for guns and knives.  You got a good deal right?  He just laughs at me.  I don't get it?  (:  So we pocked around in this cool mall and so far I have not found anything warm enough for my head that I brought from home.  So I got me a Ukrainian Beret and it is killer.  Thank goodness I got it because we found ourselves doing the whole repeat of 5 miles up hill in the snow and now add the dark!  Right before we left we needed to change currency and this adorable young lady was walking down the stairs and smiled really big and me and waved.  I smiled and waved back and thought she has got the wrong woman, I have not a clue who this girl was.  She then looked at me and pointed at the cafe.  I though the poo kid lost her marbles.  But it was me.  I stood there trying to figure it out then it dawned on me she was the girl from the cafe that said "God Bless You".  Joe and I went back to the cafe and she was heading home from work and we went in to get another coffee and say "Hi" to her.  She saw us and said "Americano".  I smiled and yes, thank you.  She talked to us a little bit and I took off my cross necklace I made before we went to adopt Kolya that was Ukraine colors and gave it to her.  She was very excited and I think I was more excited for her just knowing she is a ray of sunshine right when I needed it.  How awesome God is in his divine timing.  Before she left she found Joe and I am came and told us about herself and that she sings in the church choir.  She asked if I sang and I told her I break windows.  Her name was Lydia and she was so precious.  So we look forward and hope to see her more.  The food was very gooooooood to!!!!

We leave the mall in the dark and OOPS we head the wrong way home for about a miles and a half.  I told Joe ya know this just does not look right and it is dark and kinda creepy.  Everyone we asked did not even seem to know the "Billa" market we were talking about.  Finally this sweet older gal pointed us in the direction and turns out completely wrong and LONG way back.  So we high tailed it back knowing we had to keep moving to keep warm.  So we walked about 4 miles to finally arrive at our dear Billa market.  We walked around slow in the store so we could get the feeling in our feet back and lips.  I bought my pallet of small packages of handiwipes I can never find at home and my orange juice.  The clerks looked at me like I was nuts.  I love it!  Hey I love my handi wipes!  I always load up when I come here.

So we get home and relax and talk with Oksana our awesome in country translator.  I told Joe we should call our kiddo and put the ball in his court and ask him if he would like us to come tomorrow to his school.  Then we can get an idea where he is with us and the adoption.  Does he want us around or not.  Today Oksana talked to his teacher who again is very supportive of the adoption like all the other staff and said he has been talking about Joe and I non stop and how he is ready to go and has been counting down the days and now he is shell shocked.  Apparently Sergiy has a male mentor he talked to yesterday and he said the same thing and was shocked with the news that he didn't through out a "Yes" and run for the hills with us.  His teacher said they talked more yesterday he was tabling all the things I knew he would and was.  Not only leaving his friends but all his freedoms he has there at the school and the freedoms he will have on his own.  She said all the very smart kids this is very typical and always happens.  I have seen this pattern as well and I expected this prior to coming.  I knew this would be a lot for him and his whole world would be turned upside down and it is all happening so fast.  He is also popular at the school and very well liked.  He is one of the key players.  He likes that.  He will have to start over at home.  Granted you and I know he will have to do this again when he is on his own but he is in the now which is to be expected.  She said do you want to go home with them and he said yes I do and she said your yes yesterday was not too convincing even your mom was not convinced and that is why she wanted you to think it over.  He said he was ready and he told the social worker yes.  She laughed and said no one was convinced and she did not take it as a yes and that is why we are all meeting up again Monday.  She said Monday you got to let everyone know you are convinced with your yes.  She is a very good teacher and you can see he respects her.  She is also his PE coach and she loves him and cares about his well being.  He's a pretty blessed kid.  She said he is one of the very responsible kids in his class and helps teach with the other kids.  We saw that in him when we hosted him.  We asked if he would help Kolya with his math because we could see he is a brainac and he stepped up no problem.

So we make the call to ask if he wanted us to come tomorrow being his teachers told us we can come anytime and day we would like.  Joe talked with him for a minute and he was in very good spirits.  Then Oksana talked to him on our behalf and I could hear the energy of him on the other line.  The boy that we left at the airport and the boy that I talked to soon after he got back to Ukraine eagerly awaiting for us and openly telling us he loved us was on that phone.  I told her please tell him I love him.  And there were the precious words I did not expect to hear tell mama and papa I love them and can't wait to see them tomorrow.  Whew wee!  So I have not a clue nor expect anything for tomorrow and you never know what it will bring but we know he is battling this decision and it is a big one but we now know he wants us here right now no matter what he may show on the outside.  Oksana said there was a joy in him she had not heard yet, she said he was very excited.  So tomorrow at 2:30 we shall return to the school and love on this boy and let God do the work in our lives no matter the outcome.  To hear all his teachers and assistant director say he was a changed boy when he came back from you all.  He was respectful and had so much joy in him and just could not for you all to get here are words we will hang onto today, tomorrow and Monday.  We look back at our hosting photos and know what all we went through as a family and what all we came through as a family and we all left each other stronger and happier then when we started.  The joy in the boys was awesome. 

So please keep your prayers a coming!  They are felt and needed!  We have a long road ahead but we know we are focused on God and he is our grounding foundation in this and he know what is best for us all.  Many Blessings!

We Made It To Vil'y!

Grandma Sergiy wanted to make sure you saw his beautiful drawling.....

The masked banditos!  More like COLD banditos!

Joe, Sergiy, Sasha (The Cozza's family's soon to be son & Nicole)

Us and our boy!  Oops mom's eyes are closed!

Sergiy, Viktor and Joe playing Chess

 It was wonderful to make it to social services then the school and be greeted by so many friendly and smiling faces.  Once we were brought into the office we were greeted by a smiling face boy calling out "Mama" in his raspy Italian voice and came to me with a big hug grinning ear to ear.  Then a big hug for Papa.  The staff spoke of how he has been waiting for us and anxious for our arrival and how happy he was when we would call.  Again the teacher, directors, social worker manager and staff were incredible!  So it came down to "adoption" as we are all sitting there in the room and he had his friend Viktor there.   He wanted us to host him or adopt him.  I explained I interviewed Viktor before and because of his age he is a "Host Only" child but we can do all we can to try to find him a host family.  They asked if we would go outside and watch them do flips.  Both Viktor and Sergiy did amazing flips in the snow for us off hills and even a building roof.  Amazing athletes.  We all huddled back inside and it was clear Sergiy was distraught.  Our deal before Joe and I left was we were not going to talk Sergiy into being adopted.  If he did not want this then we would leave quietly.  Long story short he wants to come home with us, the school wants him to come home with us but the kids are his family and some are extra special to him more then others and with that he is torn about leaving them behind.  I cannot blame him when this is his family and all he has known.  We are asking him to leave everything he has known and trust us with his life when he has only known us for a short while compared to how long he has known the kids and staff at his school. Kids think about the "Now" and "Moment" verse the future outcome so I fully understand his struggle.  As he said yes to adoption I sat there staring about my boy knowing he is not settled with this answer.  I told him I need him to want to come and if he doesn't then we don't move forward.  We love him and want him to be with us but I don't want him living with regrets or "What if's".  So we all agreed for him to tell the social worker verbally Monday his answer because Papa has to go home so he can provide for the family, Monday is the deadline.  He understood fully.  He did sign on paper he wanted us to adopt but the verbal is the final move to start the paperwork rolling.

We knew prior to coming we had a good chance of this happening.  We were prepared mentally for this knowing full well this could very well but what we were faced with.  We knew there were several very important kids in his life that could shift his mind and for that he is struggling this desire to stay with them or come with us.  I would hate to be in his shoes.  I truly have no good feeling or bad feeling about this but either way but I know God put us on that plane here.  I told Joe before we left you no he could say "No" and Joe said like I mentioned in one of my previous posts "It is only money, it can be replaced".  So I knew with Joe saying this we had to get on the plane.  This was way out of the norm for him to say or act on.  It may be we bring our kiddo home.  It may be we meet up with the folks of New Hope and meet other folks in ministry, it may be I do all the interviews for NHFC and get to see these incredible kiddos.  It really could be any or all of these and I do not know the answer but God does and I find rest in that because it is all out of my control.  My only control is that I choose and can trust in the Lord and know he has it all figured out.  So after all this time spent talking about adoption, yes, no...etc. we decided to whip out chess and Viktor and Sergiy played several games against Joe.  Serious strategist game!  It was fun to watch the boys play.  Then Sergiy and I both had on turtles for our necks because neither of us do cold so we pretended we were bandits.  Then Sasha who the Cozza family soon to be son stopped in for a visit. It was great to see him.  Gave him lots of hugs on behalf of the family.  Poor kid looked at me like they were a virus too like Sergiy.  LOL!  But when we talked about his Mama and Papa he lit up and talked about how much he loved them and wants to help them with things.  Too awesome!  His krooked grin can light up a room.  It was time for lunch so the boys walked us to the car and as Sergiy was walking ahead of us with Sasha he looked at me and pointed at our car and I nodded yes.  Then he and Sasha walked on.  Sergiy stopped turned around looked and me and came back at me "Mama" with open arms.  I know my boy is torn and I am torn right there along with him.  He is a big boy and I need him to be Ok with whatever he chooses and pray he never looks back either way and kicks himself.  That is my prayer for him.  We support him no matter what it may be even if we leave minus a Dewberry. 

This morning John with Hope Ministries that just started working in Vil'y in the last 5 weeks was so generous to come pick us up this morning at the train station bright and early.  We had a delightful conversation and went out for coffee and breakfast.  Turns out tomorrow night they are having a concert and were going to join up with them, the school and kids to help out and have some fun.  So we are looking forward to the event bright and early tomorrow morning so there will be more to come!!!!

Thank you all for your continued prayers.